The sun rises once again......

Sun is up, birds are chirping, kids are off to school. However it was my first morning since school started that we were not able to ride bikes to take Sarah to school. It was really a wonderful morning ride I looked forward to. But today, my husband took her. Ty needed a big break. A break -that means no leaks and no exposures to external stimuli that he can't in the moment handle. Just when I thought our rides were successful, our little teeny tiny baby steps- I know contributed to this major fall out that occurred yesterday. When his obsessions get the best of him- it's because he cannot get his head organized enough to even just breathe. It's beyond "off" mentally. Its control, its tight grip, its negative thoughts and behaviors and actions are driven by the obsession because he can't get anything else under control and organized enough to make sense of. Too many "antecedents" as our behaviorists call it- too many things in a short period of time that just blew him over the top and plummeted him deep deep down into the earth. Today, it wasn't looking so good at first- it started to take its hold once again. But after hours and hours this morning, he finally became engaged with me. He became more focused, he became calmer, he became more present. He still seems like he is just one quick blow away from falling- but I'm hoping as the day goes on, he'll just continue to climb up and out of this deep dark hell hole that took him over yesterday. It was 24 hours of hell, of chaos, of absolute helplessness. Nothing we could do was helping him- nothing we could do would calm him down enough to help him gain some control of his own body. This ride had to end on it's own terms- and this is why Autism is always the lead teacher. But today, the sun rose again, we breath fresh air, we smile, we move on moment by moment. That's what we can do today. And know "that" moment has now passed and is not the present. Thank goodness!