Reflection on past 4th of July’s

Fourth of July 2020 is clearly unlike any other.  

The Covid 19 pandemic has  kept us from any celebrations and has turned life as we knew it upside down for the last 4 months.  

But for my family, it isn’t so unusual to be isolated; to keep our existence  in the outside world to a minimum.  

To find creative and joyful ways to get through the days in the comfort of our own little homestead.  

Paradise in a bubble, as this blog is called is the world we created out of necessity for our boy who struggled so much to exist outside our bubble to the point he wasn’t functioning, thriving, growing as all children should.

His nervous system was damaged.  His nervous system could not regulate his body.  His nervous system caused him to experience great anxiety, stress, pain that he could not live as a little boy.  I learned this is called “faulty neuroception”.  

He could only exist in fight or flight.  Or worse, freeze and collapse.

His experiences from birth with chronic pain due to severe bowel disorder, or his developmental delays, or his experiences of being in and out of the hospital too many times to count in his first years of life all while trying to exist in a world that simply overwhelmed his entire being.  

All sounds, touches, smells, so much visual stimulation, internal pain and and discomfort created so much chaos, stress and physical pain, his only way to manage was to shut down.  

Which he did regularly.  It is by far worse than any manifestation of a physical behavior we ever witnessed.  

The eyes are the window to the soul, as they say; and more times than  I can count his eyes were empty.  His body and self could not tolerate anymore.

He gave up.  He surrendered.  He just wanted it all to stop and it wouldn’t.  

How on earth with all this information we understood about our boy and his experiences could any adult actually think this little boy was being purposeful.  That he was being deliberate with his behaviors.  That he was simply “trying to get out of things”.  That he is spoiled, he needs more boundaries, he is disruptive and our responses and attention are encouraging him.

I don’t need to go further because it is all WRONG and this type of ignorance and incompetence in several professional fields especially in education only further traumatized him and our family.  

It was this point in time that in order to save our son, we needed to adapt the world around him so he could exist.  We saw that the calmer, slower, quieter we kept the world around him, he was able to be calmer, more attentive, smile, and function a little bit more.  Usually expressed through engagement with us and through play.  We knew this approach worked.  We knew it helped our boy.  We knew it was an extreme response to maintain an environment that allowed him to breathe and be present.   But when you see him smile, giggle, eat, and sleep a little more, making baby step gains in things he wasn’t able to do before, when you could see life in his eyes, we knew this extreme measure of shutting out the outside world was necessary for him to heal.  And it was helping.  

This is what he needed to heal his soul.  

It is what his body needed to heal from so much hurt and trauma since the day he was born.  It is what his nervous system needed to repair itself.  It is what he needed to be a little boy who could grow, learn, breathe.  

So we did.  We created our paradise in a bubble.  It was our families existence.  Was it hard, yes especially at first.  But when you see results, it is hard to argue it wasn’t an effective way to help him.  He showed us through other behaviors such as being playful, being funny, eating food, wanting to engage, exploring more of our bubble within our little homestead.  Note: I used the term behaviors , but not to describe something negative.  He was expressing himself through these other behaviors that shined a little light like a window into his soul.

It was the safety and connection he NEEDED in order to heal.  His entire life was full of pain, not being understood, trying to communicate his needs and wants but time and time again we ( the adults around him) all failed to respond appropriately to meet his needs.  His constant exposure to environments like hospitals, doctors offices, that are scary and full of assaulting experiences on his fragile nervous system haunts him still everyday.

It was when we realized his “behavior” was his only way to communicate for his self preservation and survival.  In reality this was a blessing because it meant he wanted to keep fighting for his life.

This “will” to survive was an important part to getting through each surgery, each procedure, each terrifying moment that he couldn’t process .  Each of these moments could have been a moment that he didn’t survive.  His will to survive, his fight to get through each of them one at a time threatened his strength to survive and was enough for us to see this is not what the “professionals “ are telling us.  

Knowing his history, his experiences, his existence since birth, how could any adult minimize him to a label of ED, emotionally disturbed?  How could any adult say he is “bad” and we are enabling him?  How could any adult who has an ounce of compassion look at this beautiful boy and say he is dangerous and violent?   

Over the years, we walked away from so many professionals, educators who clearly could not see him with empathy and compassion and a little human who needed so much connection and support to feel safe.  A little boy who struggled with the basic human needs for existence.  He struggled to eat, his bowels didn’t function properly, he didn’t sleep, he didn’t play, he didn’t explore, he didn’t thrive or make development progress; his body literally did not grow for several years.  His experiences left him in a world that he couldn’t trust, where it caused pain, he was helpless and confused and despite our greatest efforts to soothe him, comfort him, remain attached to him, provide for him, and to simply love him with every ounce of our being; his body and mind could only try to survive because his life depended on it.  

Every single minute of every single day is a moment we appreciate how far he has come.  But it is also moments we use to help him heal.  Help him to feel safe.  Help him learn trust.  Help him feel connected.  Help him and see him and all his experiences and be responsive to his needs with compassion, patience and understanding  To play with him.  To connect with him, even if it means scripting along with him and him needing me to follow the exact same script, the exact same way at the exact same time every single day.  Yes, it can be tiring.  Yes it can even be annoying and frustrating.  We are human after all.  However, this was and still is  a simple way to connect  with him, and his way of co regulating with us.  So, yeah I can do this simple act with him, especially knowing how much it helps him.    

Our parental instincts were repeatedly trampled on, ignored, criticized and we were just told so many times we were wrong.  After  the many years of following the professional advice, questioning the professional advice, recognizing their way wasn’t being effective, yet they had no further suggestions or ideas and felt the need to blame us, we stopped listening.   Their suggestions in fact caused further trauma and escalation in his “behaviors “, causing regression, causing unnecessary stress that his body just couldn’t take anymore.  How is this helping him? It clearly wasn’t.  

We knew what he needed, and we knew the extreme measures necessary to help him.   Many disagreed.  Many expressed deep concerns.  Many criticized us and even took our approach to task with calling social services on us.  But we were confident in our decision.  We knew our son best.  We were educated.  We had resources.  I was reading and learning all that I could from the very early years about the potential impact of chronic pain during those early developmental years.  The impact on development of not having bowels that functioned properly, and worse that needed invasive medical intervention everyday!  

Our family was our team.  We had his greatest interest at heart as he was our boy, he was our daughters brother, he was our guiding light and tour guide of what HE needed and what actually helped.  We just needed to “listen”.  He spoke through the only way he knew how, behaviors.  But when we stopped to observe and listen to what he was trying to communicate . It turns out, he had a lot to say!  He was and is a pretty amazing tour guide.  

If this 4th of July, 2020 during a global pandemic is any indication that the world around us is pretty chaotic, very complicated, poorly understood, creating trauma and stress in its wake, and our family continues to laugh together, to smile and share in joyous moments together and are existing with comfort and ease between the walls of our home,  when so much of the world is crumbling around them, I can only reflect back on all of our choices that got us to this point.  

Our very own paradise in a bubble.  This crazy thought process and approach helped meet the needs of our son to allow him to heal, grow, learn and become the incredibly compassionate, smart and happy young man he is today.  His smile continues to light up our world and his giggles melt my soul.  

Whoever said this thing called parenthood was going to be easy?    We were dealt this hand of having a medically complex child with developmental delays.  How could we not do everything in our power to help him?  Our journey didn’t have to be as difficult as it was.  This I know is a fact.  However, at every dark corner of the unknown, I couldn’t help but stop and reflect on our life.  Our crazy sheltered little paradise in a bubble.  What is this trying to tell us?  What are these experiences teaching us?    I couldn’t accept it was without purpose in some way.  I had to find good in every step forward, and every step backwards.  

Our son, our family have come this far, despite the numerous obstacles placed in front of all of us at every turn, but we always knew there had to be a lesson somewhere in all this suffering.  A lesson in humanity, in survival against all odds, a lesson of unconditional love, compassion and empathy.  Our son showed us how to look at the world around us with a completely different lens.  To see how experiences affect us all so differently.  Never being right or wrong, but just different and the great need to respect that in each individual, especially parents to children. 

When we see things through the eyes of a child, a lot of the behaviors we may ordinarily judge, shame, or punish are really cries of fear, uncertainty and confusion.  It is the child’s only way in that moment  to ask for help, safety and love from the parent.  

Our experiences as parents , whether we are dealt a challenge card or a wild card that is flexible and adaptable, shows us the most important part of this parenting game is about showing up for our kids.  It is about rising up to the challenges that are presented, no matter what.  It is about never giving up hope.  Hope is what can drive us when we feel defeated.  Because let’s face it, some days all we have is hope.  Our hope for our son, kept us moving forward and kept our family together.  

This is the post that popped up as a memory from July 4, 2014.  This picture and post is what sparked this article.  It is important to remember the road you have traveled,  all the curves and dead ends you encounter along the way.  Without these experiences, and then looking forward again, it is hard to see any light that might be peeking up the road.  Even if it is just a spark; a spark can set the entire forest on fire.  Our kids are full of wild fire potential.  We have got to stop extinguishing their sparks.  It is time to let them shine.  And this light will be your tour guide.

........”4th of July has never been easy for my boy.  But this picture reminds me how we have always managed to find the "sweet moments" that are buried under all the chaos of life with Autism.    I'm so proud of our boy- he has come  so far and works so hard and yesterday he was able to find his own "happy"!

Changing our lenses sooner only helps our kids sooner

“Changing our lenses sooner, only helps our kids sooner!”

I was writing something recently, introducing myself and why I am so passionate about advocacy for our kids with special needs and supporting parents along their own journeys.

It quickly reminded me why I am fighting to help all our kids.  And why I feel so compelled to educate others about this change in lens from “our kids are bad” “ our kids are dangerous” “our kids can’t be successful”....to our kids can be successful, our kids are struggling and need our help, our kids need to feel safety and connection and need US to co regulate with them.

The brain science is clear, however too few follow and understand it.  People resist change.  ABA is observable, if we offer a reward to these kids, they will comply to demands, they need motivation, and if not they need consequences etc etc etc.....

I’m an open book. I feel it is important to help others understand that they are not alone.  And so sharing personal stories has helped others to see the hard work can help things get better.

To not lose hope!

(Windy Road in September is a photograph by Shawn Einerson which was uploaded on October 15th, 2018.)

Even on those most challenging days, as parents, self reflection is key; am I regulated to be able to help my child?  Or am I joining the chaos?  

For years, I know we joined the chaos way too often.  We didn’t understand ourselves and how our response impacts our son.

Professionals in our circle told us we needed to be firm, hold the line,  to not let him escape, to be consistent, he is manipulating you, make him comply, and if it doesn’t work, it is our fault.

I never want parents to have to experience what we endured to get to this point.

Changing our lenses sooner, only helps our kids sooner.

My families story is a long journey.  Each part contributing to the next step. That’s why I take one moment at a time.  One step at a time.

Success looks different for everyone.  Don’t forget to celebrate each moment and steps along the way.

It is part of your families story.

Locked in the principals office........my own story

I was given the opportunity to write about my own personal experience.  One for so many years I didn’t understand.  But I wanted to.  It wasn’t until my boy was born that I began to understand myself a little better.  My own experiences growing up with sensory challenges and anxiety since before I could talk.  These sensory challenges and anxiety would wax and wane depending on life and life stresses.  For example, I write about what happened in second grade.  This was very uncharacteristic of me to behave in the way I did.  I explain in this article I wrote for the organization Alliance Against Seclusion and Restraint that it was clearly a stress response to so many new things happening in my life that I literally lost the ability to cope.  The stresses exceeded my capacity to maintain some sense of myself.  It was literally all too much.  This is what happens to so many kids that are neurodiverse.  Our brains are wired in a manner that sometimes causes us to be overwhelmed by everyday events.  And sometimes when we are not given time to recuperate, to distress, to process and to regulate, this chronic toxic stress takes our ability to handle a situation to a new level of not handling it.  Therefore, an outburst, a behavior, a freak out; whatever you want to call it.  It is all the same.  My own experience helped me to better understand my son and his challenges. My hey weren’t the same, but I learned to appreciate his lenses that he saw and experienced the world through.  Here is my story.   Click the link and it will direct you to the Alliance Against Seclusion and Restraint website and the post is below.

https://endseclusion.org/2020/06/28/reflections-on-my-childhood-locked-in-the-principals-office/

Reflections on my childhood: Locked in the principal’s office

Today’s guest author is Jennifer Abbanat. Jennifer is a wife and mom to three kids ages 18, 16, and 13. Jennifer is an advocate and voice for her neurodiverse children. She and her family live in Northern California.

I have never really stopped to reflect on my own traumatic childhood experiences until just recently. I have memories from my childhood that seemed normal to me for many years, but now I’m seeing it all through a new lens. My parents never understood how their extremely quiet, shy, well behaved, anxious, sensory overwhelmed little girl could behave the way I did. Many years later I am beginning to understand.

There have been so many horrifying stories in the media in recent years about students being restrained at school, being secluded in closets or rooms at school. One story that is very close to my heart is of a boy named Max Benson. He is my dear friend’s son who was killed at school from prolonged restraint. He is my motivation to see that laws and policies change in our schools and our communities to protect our kids. Too many kids have suffered or worse have been killed at the hands of the adults who were supposed to protect them. I often wonder what would have happened to me if I was a child “behaving the way I did in second grade” today, in the year 2020, instead of 40 years ago. There seems to be so little compassion and tolerance for kids who are struggling. They are viewed by the adults as if they are in control and being purposeful in their noncompliance or in their behavior. Knowing what I went through, it saddens me that this barbaric treatment continues to happen every day in schools around this country. Since Max’s death, there have been more stories of kids being secluded, restrained and even killed. This has got to stop. Things must change.

I am at a place today that I can now recall my own story of being secluded and restrained and the impact this experience had on my life. Having my own child who is also easily overwhelmed has helped me to better understand my own childhood. 

I grew up thinking that I was weird, something was wrong with me, I wasn’t “normal “. Like my son, I was just misunderstood.

I think these experiences helped me have even more compassion and empathy for my son’s behaviors and struggles. If I could have behaved that way all those years ago in response to so many changes, it makes sense that my son could struggle with his own challenging behaviors. He was born with severe chronic medical issues that caused him a lot of pain, especially in his first 3 years of life. This was in addition to his developmental delays, which we first noticed through all his sensory challenges that were pretty extreme before his first birthday. This kept us fighting to get answers for him so we could better support him.

I recently saw a video shared on social media that showed a young boy being dragged down a hallway at school, it really impacted me. My own memory of being dragged from my mom’s van, because I refused to get out. This haunts me to this day. Two adults, one taking my arms and one taking my legs, carrying me like a hog from the front of the school to the principal’s office. I had just started 2nd grade. I had just celebrated my 7th birthday. I fought. I screamed. I wiggled. I spit. I was fighting for my life; that is how I remember it. I was panicked and scared. 

I was locked in the principal’s office by myself with an aide standing outside the door telling me to “calm down”.

Sometimes there would be a staff member in the office with me, standing guard at the door so I couldn’t run out. I remember them telling me I would get a red slip if I “didn’t stop”. This was part of a reward/consequence behavior system. Red slips were bad is all I knew. And for a kid who always did as I was told and was a rule follower, that didn’t help. I wasn’t in control of my body. I wasn’t purposely deciding to behave this way. I didn’t understand what was happening. I was terrified; how was I supposed to calm down? For many years after this, I wondered to myself, what happened to me? Why did I behave that way? I didn’t understand any of it. No one did. Until I had my son.

I remember feeling shame and embarrassed; especially as I grew up when people would bring up these incidences and laugh about them. I was the kid who bit, hit, kicked, and spit on the principal and teachers when I started 2nd grade. That was a lot of attention for a kid who would rather melt into the background and disappear.

This all came about after my family moved. I had liked school in kindergarten and first grade, so this didn’t make sense to my parents. I was normally the kid who would hide away when overwhelmed; which was fairly common if you talk to people who knew me. I was the kid that would be described as scared of everything. Scared of loud noises, big trucks, fire trucks, strangers, going somewhere unfamiliar. They just said I was an anxious child. I remember always hiding in my closet to shut out the overwhelming events happening around me. So my reaction, which was fighting and running away was all new. I had never behaved that way before, I was attending a new school. We moved to a new house, a new town, a new everything. There were a lot of new things all at once. Clearly, this was a major stress response that pushed me beyond my capacity to cope with all of this change. So instead of hiding as I usually did, my body fought back. This fight going to school went on for the first two months of that new school year. I think some days, my mom and dad just didn’t want to deal with it so they didn’t even bother to try to send me to school sometimes. But I was still punished and told to stay in my room on those days. I wanted to behave. I just couldn’t help it.

I’m now 47. After having my son who, is diagnosed with autism and has chronic medical issues, is when I started to understand my own childhood experiences. The cycle of seclusion and restraint needs to end. We must develop relationships and express compassion and empathy for those that are struggling. Anything else just causes pain and trauma. 

I’ve finally learned that what happened to me wasn’t normal, and it should never happen to any child. However, we know all too well how common seclusion and restraint are used in our schools.

This past year, I started a local parent support group. Parents and families benefit from being able to share their experiences and struggles and feel connected to other parents who understand. Parents are a valuable resource for each other and now that I have older kids and my family is not living in crisis mode on a daily basis, I try to provide helpful information, be a resource guide, and create an opportunity for others to connect. I believe our children can be successful. I’ve seen my son make gains that nobody thought he was capable of. He now experiences joy and expresses happiness.

I believe parents are their kid’s best advocates. Unless and until our kids are shown compassion, patience, and feel connected to those around them, many will continue to struggle and be misunderstood. It is time to end seclusion and restraint.

This was a moment I never want to re live......but yet it saved our boy

This was a FB memory that popped up a few days ago.  I saved it.  I wasn’t ready to re live that moment that I wrote about.  It was one of the worst moments we experienced with our boy.  It was I’m sure  one of the scariest moments for our boy.  So many factors intersected at that moment that created this event.
But it leads me to today. I can’t go back and fix that moment.  Although I wish I could.  It was the beginning of several  more difficult moments that resulted in the scariest summer that just wouldn’t stop spiraling out of control.  But it was also the summer where we decided we had to take control and do whatever was necessary to literally save our boy.  And this is when we turned to cannabis for him.

Here is the post from that moment in June 2015.

I was hoping to be posting how excited I was that Ty was participating in a basketball camp this week...... he did it last summer (a DIFFERENT camp)- but he was excited as he LOVES basketball!
Unfortunately, it was just too much for him - it was only 2 hour camp- but there was loud music during warm ups, so many kids, lots of "cheer" type team yelling and well......... his body just couldn't tolerate that environment- even to play basketball!   He didn't even make it into the car before melting down.... he attempted to jump out of the car when I tried to drive home- Brian had to come help me as I sat parked on Oak St- with a raging boy....   and then he kicked our windshield in the middle of his rage- and broke the windshield- yep it was simply TOO MUCH for him....... yesterday was so hard- I hated seeing what was happening to my boy- haven't seen that in quite a while- this was a bad meltdown-     These are the days that I hate Autism..... my boy just wanted to play basketball like other kids- it was only a 2 hour camp-   but to say it sent him into absolute sensory overload is an understatement........   back to our bubble for a while to help him "calm" his being    -


Cannabis was the necessary medicine to help heal our boy.  Cannabis helped our boy be the little boy that he never got to be.  Like everything else it was a process.  It was hard work.  It required patience and time.  It required a lot of observation and note taking.  It required a lot of reading and learning. It required love and compassion.  It required laws that allowed us to have safe access to good quality whole plant cannabis.  Not just one component of the plant.  The entire plant.

 Cannabis contains over 500 distinct compounds.  These are called cannabinoids, terpenoids, flavonoids, and omega fatty acids. (“Learn About Cannabis”, UCLA Health; Cannabis Research Initiative).  CBD, THC, CBDa, THCa, CBG, CBN are just a few of the cannabinoids that are unique to cannabis that have been shown to have medical benefits.  Research has identified over 100 cannabinoids.  More research is still needed to see if they offer any health benefits.  As reference, we give our son microdose (.05ml) of indica THC.  This is what has allowed him to function as all children deserve.  This has allowed him to express joy, to smile and be happy, to laugh, to be in a calm enough state that allows him to breathe and be present.  What a gift this is to see in him!

If our experience leading up to the summer of 2015 was any indication that our boy was desperately communicating through his struggles, his challenges, his behaviors that he NEEDED help in a way we had never seen before, I cannot even comprehend what life would be like for him if we didn’t act on his cries for help.

 Our  boy just turned 16.  He will be starting the 10th grade in the fall.  He is managing the best he can under these pandemic circumstances.  He misses basketball.  But he has accepted that right now, there can be no basketball team.  Something out of his control, but yet he is able to maintain his control. This is what cannabis has done for our boy.  Everyone should have access to try it.  It is a medicine.  How many more lives could be saved if more people were able to have safe access to cannabis?

My boy is 16!,,

Just re posting this birthday post from 6 years ago.  When our boy turned 10!  This number at one point scared the hell out of me as what things would be like as our sweet but struggling boy grew up.  Well today he is 16!
This post says it all!  And is why he is our super hero and we are his biggest fans!

“Happy 10th Birthday to our Ty!

Ten years ago our lives forever changed by the beautiful gift of our only son.  At that time we had no idea what was in store for his life, the struggles he would endure, the medical problems, the developmental delays.
 But he truly is a gift- as he has taught US so much more than I ever knew about myself.  Because of him we are stronger than we ever thought possible.  His journey is an amazing lesson in life and has taught us to treasure each and every moment- and to truly appreciate the littlest of things- things that are usually overlooked or under appreciated.   He has brought a whole new meaning to the phrase "stop and smell the roses".......
He has his dog Gretchen now and she will continue to help us better help him so that he can experience more happiness and joy in his life.... he has taught us that sometimes things aren't so traditional, and that doesn't mean less, it's just a different way to experience life.  He is so passionate about what brings him joy- animals, dogs, basketball, all sports, science.... and loves to share his knowledge!
He has so many wonderful things to share with the world, and we will continue to help him express it and grow so that others can experience the wonderful joy he truly is.

 He really is a gift from God and we are so blessed to be his parents along this journey of life with him.  Happiest  10th birthday to our little boy-    life will continue to get better!   We promise!”

I do not give my consent for” seclusion and restraint”

Do you have a "no consent for seclusion or restraint letter" on file with your childs school ?

Do you think it can never happen to your child?  Your childs school is really helpful and understanding and would never do this?

Think again.  In the heat of a moment, in the middle of a meltdown  or another behavior ,  stress response it happens!  Even here in Davis!  It happens everywhere.

Unfortunately most teachers and staff are not properly trained to work with situations like this and more importantly are not properly trained to be proactive and understand all the ways to work with our kids that supports them,  and can recognize all the subtleties of dysregulation to be proactive and connect, co regulate before the bigger stress response/behavior gets to this point.   It can be done.
We need to protect our children from unsafe practices.

Excellent article and a must read !  It is too important for our kids safety and well being.

https://www.inclusionevolution.com/child-needs-no-consent-letter-restraint-seclusion/

This is a comment from another parent regarding this article:
         I can't believe this is happening in schools.  The woman at the desk didn't bat an eye.  This must be the norm at that school????????

This is my response to her comment:
              People see the child as the problem.  So of course the adults must react this way, ugh according to this thinking.  It is the child's issue.   If they just listened,  if they just did what they were told to do, if they just would have stopped when I told them to.  This is what happens everyday in our classrooms and schools.
These instances are just ones caught on camera.  It is sad.  And is causing so much damage to our already fragile children.   Our schools need to be trained and educated in proactive solutions and training of how to properly support our kids.  I know so many teachers who feel ill equipped to properly educate and work with most of our special needs kids.  They were trained for general ed and have no idea how to support the many kids in our gen ed classrooms that have some form of a disability that impacts their learning and   education. The paras supporting our kids in a 1 to 1 or 2 to 1 situation are also not trained in how to work with our kids.   This sets our kids up for failure from the beginning.  So when our kids are expected to do something or to follow a direction that they may not understand,  or their nervous system is already on high alert due to the full class environment,  the lights, the sounds, the smells, etc....so they r one demand away from a meltdown or behavior,  boom.
But yet the teacher has 29 other students to focus on.  How is it possible??  I do not fault teachers at all.  The system is flawed from the beginning and not set up to properly support and educate many of our kids.   We have to change this.

This post says it all!

I am reposting this excellent post from Alliance Against Seclusion and Restraint

This post says it all!!

”Trauma is in fact a “physical injury” to the brain. Studies show childhood trauma has lifelong impact on both mental and physical health.

This is info we all need to carry with us into our advocacy because we must disabuse schools and legislators of the notion that trauma isn’t a physical injury.

Trauma does permanent physiological damage to the brain. The brain is the most vital organ in the human body. Hence, damage done to the most vital organ in the body is indeed a “physical injury.”

Some states have banned restraints that “impede breathing.” What about restraints that impede the ability for a developing brain to function properly when exposed to persistent primal fight, flight, or freeze reactions?

Think about it.
#endseclusion“

https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=95ovIJ3dsNk

 Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, California Surgeon General