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My Paradise in a Bubble: feeling alone......

Monday, July 27, 2015

feeling alone......

After the last post this past Thursday, a second event occurred.

We had to bring him to the ER

To make the long, drawn out story (feels like a book we're reading, not our lives)and after 7 hours went home

Did he get the help he so desperately needs?

Nope- once again major system failure

After being there 2 1/2 hours, a psych response team person came to talk with us- she is a SW- not familiar with Autism

was very nice, but saw no reason to have to 5150 or hold him

because yes, by this point he is pretty calm, he's still definitely agitated and wants to go home

But even when she talks to him, asks him questions- she is taking his answers at face value

HE HAS AUTISM..... she doesn't understand he is working from a scrip- in fact, it's from my conversations since he is present when we have to talk to the doctors

down to him stating it started back in May and it's been rougher these last few weeks....

This is scripting... he doesn't know how else to communicate at this point

but they are words, clear words, she doesn't understand these things

interesting thing when she was talking to him and asking questions... he would give an answer he thought she wanted to hear (because he's very smart)

and when she asked him if he knows what a particular word means- he simply stated NO

WHAT?

And that's because he doesn't fully understand a lot of what is said to him- he'll get bits and pieces of conversations- not understand it all- and make up the rest in his mind- which is probably why he "mis hears" us or gets angry because what he inserts into the conversation to try to make sense of it.

Anyway, regardless we went home, feeling hopeless to properly help out sweet boy, with all the people who are supposed to help him just simply saying' I'm sorry, we feel your frustration, but there isn't anything we can do"

So just like we thought, the ER is a holding tank- he calms down, we go home

until the next "thing" no matter how big or small causes him to explode

because right now there is an underlying "thing" happening to him causing him to behave this way- his behavior is the symptom..... he's not a bad boy... he doesn't understand how to properly express what is happening, what he is feeling, and even on the BEST of days, that is a difficult task

one we continue to work on at great lengths- helping him find his words to communicate so that the rest of us understand his needs/wants

so here we are

It's Monday

he woke up very off, very angry, very combative before even the day started

he's taking a nap right now- good sign? bad sign?

too early to say-

we did have a lovely family moment last night- in fact, as tough as it can be, he didn't need restraint at all and I don't think he hit or threw objects at anyone the entire day!

I'm hoping day 1 of many to come

but Brian is back to work, and our only plan, our only thing we CAN do because despite our greatest of efforts to get him proper help

there is nothing we can do- so if a behavior starts, he's too aggressive towards us or throwing objects and destroying property

our only option- is to leave

and hope that with time and everyone away- he calms down and by the time we return, things are improved!

This is our only option and this is because of major system failure to properly treat a sweet child like ours- who struggles with both medical and mental health issues......

and he's only 11

I just hope and pray that we can get things moving on the right path, sooner, rather than later...

This is very hard- and I can only imagine how much harder it is for him.

He doesn't want to behave this way- we know that- but he doesn't have control over any part of his being right now

and he's struggling.

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